"Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own"

Paris - 

After an uneventful first evening in Paris that saw me checking into my hostel - Oops - and having dinner at an Indian restaurant, I awoke on Monday ready to tackle the city.  As I mentioned on Facebook, I strangely was sharing the hostel room with 3 guys from Brazil.  None of them knew each other but I was definitely in the minority - language and gender-wise!

I left my hostel located on the Avenue des Gobelins- yes, this means what you think it does.  Avenue of the Goblins.  Don't know why, I never saw any goblins while I was there ;)  I was on a mission to The Louvre and after consulting the map, decided I could easily walk there.  This was my first mistake.  Paris is MUCH larger than London and what I thought would take me around 25 minutes, actually took me closer to an hour.  It was a pretty walk though - along the Seine, over the Pont Neuf and finally to my destination.  When I finally got there, I knew I couldn't enter the place without first grabbing a sandwich and some coffee.  My breakfast of a piece of bread and some juice wasn't going to last me for the several hours The Louvre requires.

After fortifying myself properly, I entered the quad that houses the huge pyramid.  The outside of The Louvre takes your breath away and is jaw-droopingly huge.  Museums of its stature are - of course - large...but this place is mammoth.  I had been here when I was 16, but my recollection of the place was an In-n-Out experience.  Being herded through it to see a few choice items - Venus de Milo, Mona Lisa, Jaques Louis David's Napoleon picture, etc.  As I rode the escalator down from the Pyramid to the below ground ticket area, I can't help but describe the buzzing activity below as belonging more to a busy train station like Paddington in London than a museum.  Zoo is the other world that comes to mind, but I visited another zoo the next day complete with animal sculptures outside...The Musee d'Orsay.  

But first...The Louvre.  I'm sure many of you reading this have visited The Louvre, so my thoughts and descriptions won't be anything new to you...but perhaps you will keep reading...

1. If you think you are going to see everything The Louvre had to offer, think again.  
2. I was in the place less than 10 minutes when my survival instincts kicked in and screamed, "RUN"...."FLEE"..."Get out of here"!!!!  And I almost did - but 10E is 10E and I wasn't wasting it.  I mean, I'd seen this place already and the enormous mass of people moving in every direction along with the deafening din was pushing me to my "Horde" limit.  But Beth, you love art museums.  How could you possibly consider leaving the most famous one in the world??!!  I'll tell you why....This wasn't a museum, it was a battle zone - the art lovers vs. the sightsee-ers.  I am going to consider my battle a Pyrrhic victory.  I may have emerged several hours later with a "win" on my hands...but it came at a high price.  I was bleary-eyed, battle sore, mentally numb and thinking "not so nice" thoughts about our Far East friends.  I have not had the pleasure of visiting that part of the world yet like my brother has - and I very much want to - but it is going to require months of mental preparation to adequately deal with the "personal space" issues - or rather -the lack of respect when it comes to personal space - that seems to afflict our Asian friends (in case you can't tell, I'm desperately trying not to come across as racist).
3. The Louvre suffers from Koi or Goldfish syndrome....the larger the environment, the larger the crowd swells to completely occupy every square foot possible.
4. Lest you think I only have negative thoughts to express - fear not - somehow in this overwhelming mass of humanity, I managed to run into one of the guys sharing my room in the hostel - Leonardo from Brazil.  Not to be confused with the other Brazilian who dropped the gem - "Are you from Tennessee?  B/C you are the only Ten I See"  Bahahahahaha.  Leonardo was the other, other one.  As mentioned, I was sharing a room with 3 Brazilian guys.  Before your eyes widen when considering the "safety" issue - just don't go there.  It is a hostel, full of lovely people and every one of these guys was wonderful.  No cause for concern - and when it comes right down to it (I could have taken them all - maybe not all at once - but I could do some damage).  So, out of thousands of people - possibly TENS of thousands - this place definitely holds a football stadiums worth of people - I found the ONE person I knew in Paris.  How does that happen?
5. Moving around with someone who felt the same way was comforting - you can exchange knowing looks at the same bizarre behavior, and this guy was big...so he was a good offensive lineman - and a defensive blocker when needed....PLUS, this may have been the funniest thing said all day (prepare yourselves for a "racist" statement of sorts...not made by me....only faithfully relayed...).  After attempting to take several pictures throughout the museum of both statues and paintings, and then finding them "ruined" by people from a certain area of the world already mentioned, Leonardo loudly exclaimed, "Damn!!  There's one in EVERY freaking picture....ALWAYS ONE!!!"  I don't know why that was so funny to me, but at that particular moment, I could only let out a loud guffaw, bend over and continue to belly-laugh for a full 2-3 minutes.  That laughing allowed me to purge all the anxiety that had been eating away at me because of the crowds.
6. Somehow Leonardo and I ran into Ali, the other Brazilian from the room - so now, Oops Hostel rm 106 had become an effective triumvirate to go conquer the streets of Paris.  A hasty exit from The Louvre deposited us back on the Rue de Rivoli - in need of refreshment...again.  Lenoardo wanted McDonald's.  I did not.  But, we agreed to accompany him there - buying a lemon sorbet along the way - just what the medic ordered for me.  After some consultation about where to go next - many sights/museums are alternately closed on Mondays and Tuesdays in Paris - and, we were all tired.  As I've said, The Louvre is huge and you actually do walk miles to see the different features.  We all settled on "The Pompidou" - which suited me just fine - moving from true Classical art to the modern of the Modern.  Let's do it!!
7. The Pompidou - aka Centre Georges Pompidou - a former French President.  This place could NOT be more different from The Louvre - which is housed in a former palace.  The Pompidou is more like an Industrial building - at the heart of the funky Marais district - and resembles a large "mouse maze" - full of colored tubes, rooms that dead end and escalators shuttling people up and down in a zig-zag...all of which is exposed and visible to the people on the plaza down below.  Interestingly - a James Bond movie had a few scenes filmed here....It was Holly Goodhead's office in the film "Moonraker" and used as the villain - Hugo Drax's - space station...YAY...James Bond!!!  The Pompidou is also huge - it covers 5 acres!!
8. I may not be the biggest modern art fan, but "Modern" encompasses the very late 19th century through today...and there were some damn good artists working during the first 50 or so years of the 20th century....Braque, Rothko, Kandinsky, Matisse, Picasso,  - The Cubists, The Fauve movement..... This museum is wonderful.  It houses the largest modern art collection in Europe - i.e. huge.  It has a monster collection that just seems to go on forever.  As soon as you think you have finished an area, you see a little hallway that leads to a whole new wing.  
9. The cool thing about visiting The Pompidou is that I was just at the Tate Modern in London, less than a month ago - and they have many similar pieces - Matisse's sculptures of "Backs", the same photo by Diane Arbus - a child holding a grenade in a park (creepy) and a piece by Cy Twombley (who just died...sigh) - At Tatianna....remember the exhibit we saw in Philly??  About the Iliad - you took a pic of me viewing it....well, they had one of those pieces in The Pompidou - "Achilles mourning the death of Patroclus"!!!  Anyways - I genuinely enjoyed this museum, but towards the end of my visit - my dogs weren't just barking...they were baying at the moon!!  Things look close to each other on the map in Paris, but they aren't!!

One funny experience in The Pompidou....there is currently a special exhibition of Indian artists and one particular section is hyper-sexual.  Nothing too gratuitous - but one small gallery, in particular - had a series of photographs depicting a male couple - throughout the course of their relationship.  Well, some of the photos don't leave much to the imagination - and despite a posted "Warning" - that some of the galleries contain material of a sexual nature that some - particularly families - may find offensive, a mother entered the one I was in with her small daughter - couldn't have been more than 3 or 4.  The mother didn't get more than 5 steps into the room - and I was watching her closely - when her eyes widened, she let out an honest to God shriek, almost jerked her daughter's arm out of its poor socket, and clapped her hand over the girl's eyes as she dragged this child "out of the line of fire"!!  I could only chuckle - and more loudly after I caught the eye of another person in the gallery.  We just shook our heads and laughed together for a minute...too funny.

10. We left The Pompidou around 7:45pm - thoroughly shredded.  All 3 of us were hungry and tired.  But we didn't want to head for the hostel just yet.  Leonardo wanted to pop some champagne at the Eiffel Tower as it lit up for the evening and that sounded like as good a plan as any.  We grabbed some snacks and found some champagne.  I had thought a bottle of sparkling wine would do just fine, but Leonard was determined to have champagne - so Veuve Clicquot it was!!  I wasn't going to complain...no sir, not one bit.  Veuve means no nasty champagne hangover!!  We got off the Metro at The Trocadero - probably the best view of the Tower in the city.  Made our way down to the Champ du Mars - amongst the herd of guys selling ugly Eiffel Tower trinkets as well as Wine and "Cham-Pay-An".  We spread our picnic out on the grass, removed our shoes to rub our feet on the cool grass and let out a collective sigh that we were there...and didn't have to move again for a couple hours.  The Tower lit up around 9:30pm and started its sparkly show at about 10pm.  We popped our champagne, toasted to the fact that we were in Paris, drank the bottle and around midnight - hit a little creperie for a true midnight snack - found the Metro, headed for the Hostel and fell into our beds.  

Day 1 in Paris complete....and satisfactorily so!!

Before beginning Day 2 - this is my humble suggestions to the museums of Paris....You are world-class museums. Everybody knows who you are and checks your websites frequently. You could move to a timed entry/reservation system so that people could truly enjoy what is housed inside, instead of feeling like cattle being herded through the stockyards. People would still come to visit. Just have Rick Steves or Samantha Brown mention that you have moved to a new system and you will be set for publicity!!

Day 2 will be brief.  It's difficult for me to describe what I went through at the Musee d'Orsay.  I had a bad "Mom" day - where everything just seems to remind me of the loss.  I think this must have been her favorite museum - I know it was in the Top 3 if not her favorite.  It houses some of the most famous Impressionist paintings - and the gut-wrenching moments came when I kept seeing paintings that Mom had hung in our house....6 in total.  Seeing the first was a small clench of the stomach (Monet's "Field of Poppies")....seeing the next one 5 minutes later (Renoir's "La Balancoire") wiped the smile off my face...and finding myself in front of Renoir's "La Lileuse" did me in.  The tears gathered in my eyes and my sniffling nose could not be silenced.  I was in another huge horde of people - and couldn't find anywhere to escape....and there was still a lot to be seen.  This was just the first gallery.  I decided to come back to that gallery after I had collected myself - and decided to head upstairs to the restaurant, which I had heard wonderful things about.  My lunch was superb - expensive, but superb.  Beef Carpaccio with parmesan shavings, a watercress salad, an olive vinaigrette and delicious caper berries.  Finished off with a chocolate gateau and espresso.  I did some writing in my journal (what you read above about The Louvre) and decided I was now strong enough to continue.  

I headed down the opposite side of the main floor - but managed to find myself feeling exactly like I had an hour ago when I was confronted with Van Gogh's "L'eglise d'Auvers" - Mom had this hanging above the Plantation Ledger in the Living Room for years.  The sadness engulfed me again and I just stood there staring at it - noticing how the accents of orange really set the church off against the brilliant blue sky.... trying to think about anything other than the fact I wouldn't be able to tell her that I had seen this painting.  I stumbled around for another few hours - loving the museum - but unable to separate myself from the feeling that I constantly wanted to go somewhere and simply fall apart.  I have never wanted someone to put their arms around me so badly and tell me "it will be ok, just go ahead and cry."  Instead, I was surrounded by soaring walls, cold marble, strangers and beautiful works of art.  Unfortunately, they could not give me what I needed that day.  All I could think of was a particular U2 song that my brother and I listened to in the car right after I picked him up from the Raleigh airport in November.  We had reached the Goat Farm - hadn't managed to say too much to each other on the drive - we were both too numb.  But I had my U2 mix on - and the song "Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own" came on.  Even though we had arrived at our destination, we sat in the car holding hands while listening to the words....

And it's you when I look in the mirror
And it's you when I don't pick up the phone
Sometimes you can't make it on your own

Can you hear me when I sing
You're the reason I sing
You're the reason, why the Opera is in me

Well hey now, still gotta let you know
A house doesn't make a home
Don't leave me here alone

My mom is the reason why art "is in me",  I just hate that I can no longer share this love with her.  I have felt this way before when visiting a museum - in Chicago and in London...but it is the first time so many of the paintings she loved were in one place...it felt like blow, after blow, after blow....and it didn't ever let up.....Degas, Renoir, Sisley, Pisarro, Monet, Van Gogh, Gaugin.....

When I finally left the Musee d'Orsay - I think it is one of the best museums I have ever visited, but I felt such sadness.  I headed for the Musee Rodin b/c I didn't want to be around hordes anymore and I wanted to be in an open space to just think.  Mission accomplished - but crying and feeling so sad will just drain the life out of you.  I had a low key evening - spent drinking a bottle of wine in a  park with a lovely Canadian I met at the Hostel.  Sometimes the simple company of a stranger is enough to make you forget your problems and re-focus on the good things in your life - i.e. this trip and my friends and family.

Happiness is not about getting what we want, it is about appreciating what we have.

And right now, I have a great trip to enjoy.  It's ok to feel sad, I just have to concentrate on learning how to accept and feel the sadness without letting it overrun me and hold me hostage.  Hopefully a good lesson learned...we'll see.  Many more art museums to visit...

Today - Lyon.  Going to their art museum and need to sort out a few train tickets - this Rail Europe website is bull----!!  I have to go waste time in Lyon going back to the train station to deal with something that should be able to be arranged online....oh well.  It's never really about the individual traveler is it - only about the corporation and making money??

More soon......